How to Create and Commit to Boundaries
Often I found myself completely depleted because I was opening my energy to everyone and wanted people to like me- a classic case of people pleasing. I wasn’t sure where this came from, or how it snuck up on me so quickly, growing up this is nowhere near the strong-willed, independent, trailblazer I had always been. Analyzing the “why” and the “how” helps, until they simply become stories, and it is important to take action and make a change- and STICK to it.
Creating boundaries comes with grounding down. The more grounded we are in ourselves, we can live in alignment with our truth. When we fully love and trust ourselves, our words and actions are in alignment with our hearts. This is vital for creating healthy relationships, finding work that we love, and spiritual growth.
So, how do you ground down? It comes back to the conversation of whether we are making our choices out of fear or love. This topic has been addressed before, but how do we really live in love? Being grounded is related to the ability to live in our body and emotions, and in full trust of the universe and our being. When we are grounded, we are able to listen, receive, and respond. Our boundaries come from love because our hearts are our protection, however, first, our hearts must open for that to be possible in living reality.
In the beginning, simply following your feelings, such as when we feel discomfort or fear, and listening to them, asking them questions, etc. will help you to understand your fear. Personally, I feel that if you feel a threat, regardless of it’s rational, it is important to listen to it and honor yourself first. Slowly, through meditation, coaching, energy work, kriya yoga, or otherwise, we can learn to be with our fear and transcend it through love. Through this experience, grounding into our bodies, into our hearts, and into our being, occurs.
When we are grounded, boundaries simply happen. It is an interesting phenomena- when ungrounded, there is a need to actively create boundaries, which is only relevant to a certain point. By relaxing into our being, our hearts open and protect us through the language of feeling: i.e., when fear arises, we know to leave a situation, when stress arises, we are out of alignment, when bliss arises, we are in alignment. Emotional intelligence comes with grounding, which is what our boundaries are made from. From this space, love truly has no boundaries, because each emotion becomes an expression of love.